The Pankhurst Family

2 little things I'm thankful for..

2011-10-11T04:05:00.000-07:00

Hope everyone had a great thanksgiving weekend!! We sure did.

Summer

2011-10-08T04:13:00.000-07:00

I had a great summer.. We were super busy. I did tons of shoots and still managed to spend lots of time in Leavitt and even took a few trips to Montana with my parents. All in all it was awesome. It would have been better if Spence was here but what do ya do.. we see lots of him for the next 7 months. Anyway here are " a few" pics of this summer. It's really quite embarrassing how neglected this poor little blog has been lately.

Life can be hard sometimes

2011-08-31T17:44:00.000-07:00

Everyone has there trials. Everyone has there blessings. I found myself thinking a week and a half ago that things were just "perfect" right now. I was happy. Spencer was coming home. Life was good.

A week ago I had to say goodbye to another grandparent. As I went to the funeral home to give my Grandpa Leavitt his very last haircut I couldn't help but remember the time I went to curl my grandma packs hair at the same place 5 months ago. In 18 months I have lost 3 grandparents. 1 was from a hideous disease that took him quickly, 1 was a tragic completely unexpected event, 1 was old age. All very different, all very sad. Death is a part of life. I understand that if you live you have to die.. but it doesn't make it easy. I am grateful that my grandpa Leavitt is in a better place. That his body is free of pain and confusion. I am so happy that he can be reunited with all of his many siblings, parents, friends, ect. But as I watched my poor little sweet grandma say goodbye to her husband of 73 years my heart broke. It doesn't matter how old a person is, they are still a person that is loved. He lived a wonderful life and he is a perfect example of how we should all live our lives. I know no one is perfect.. but he is about as close to it as you can get. I have NEVER heard him utter an unkind word about anyone. He dedicated his life to the lord and I know he is exactly where he deserves to be. There is no question in my mind.

So yes, we all have our trials. As we have had a few disappointments over the last few days and have really had to step back and re evaluate some huge life decisions, Spencer and I have really had to rely on the lord and we know that life will take us down the path we are supposed to be on if we live righteously.

As we knelt in prayer as a family I felt very strongly that Heavenly Father had a bigger plan for us and someday we would understand why things happen the way they do.

Little dancers

2011-06-18T12:14:00.000-07:00

Soph & Grace had there dance recital. We decided to opt out of the recital last year and go see daddy in Winnipeg instead so this was a whole new thing for us this year. It was so fun for them to finally be able to show us all what they have been working on for the last few months. I was really impressed with how far Soph has come in the last 2 years. She started when she wasn't even 3 and she could barely walk without tripping over her own two feet. She is much more graceful now and it has really helped her come out of her shell too. She used to be so shy! I don't know if she will be doing ballet next year or if she'll do gymnastics instead but I do know that I am so proud of my little dancer and how brave she was dancing in front of all those people! I don't know if I could have done that at 4 years old.

I can do tough things

2011-06-07T23:18:00.000-07:00

Im still here...

And Im ok

My mom said something that really hit me.

She said through losing weight she has realized she can do tough things.

Little did we know that the emotional journey my mom and I set out on 1 year ago to lose weight would actually prepare us for what happened 2 months ago.

I miss her so much, my heart hurts so much.

I still cry everyday.

I dream of both of there sweet faces every night.

But I am ok.

Because I'm stronger that I thought.. and I can do tough things.

How do I feel?

2011-04-20T13:36:00.000-07:00

GRATEFUL
-to have 28 years of such wonderful memories with such an amazing person.
-to have had a grandma that was just like a mom to me. I don't think a lot of people are as close to there mom as I was to my grandma. I said at the funeral that I have always felt like I have 2 moms. My mom is the greatest mom in the world.. But I had 2 of them. I was lucky!
-that she didn't have to grow old, have health problems. She died healthy. I know that sooner or later she was going to start to grow old and how lucky for her that she got to skip that.
-that she is with gramps and her little Kathleen
-that I have such an extremely wonderful family that I can lean on for support.
-that she didn't have to suffer for long
-that we could pay tribute to her and it all went as good, if not better than we had hoped. I know she was proud and I could feel her there. I was privelaged enough to share some memories and sing and even though I didn't hold it together as good as I had hoped I know she was proud.
-to be so blessed to have her in my life for eternity

SAD
-that I lost her
-that she didn't get to see my kids grow up
-that she was sad for the last 16 months without gramps and we couldn't fix that sadness
-for everyone else in my family
-that life is going to be really different and empty
-that life just isn't going to be as fun without her
-that I won't be getting my daily phone calls from her
-that she isn't going to be my summer friend again this summer. We spent so much time together last summer and had big plans for this one too. We were going to be the "single ladies club".. no spencer and i are not separating.. he is gone with work a lot. :)
-that I don't have my gram to cuddle with anymore
-that my girls don't have grandma chicken to have sleepovers with, play with, sing with, laugh at and talk too.
-that I feel alone

CONFIDENT
-that I will see her again!!!!
-that she is happy
-that she was proud of me
-that I was a good friend to her
-that she is watching over me
-that I will pattern my life after hers.
-it was her time
-that I will be able to be happy again and someday smile when I think of her instead of cry

Thank you all so much for your love, support and mostly your prayers. We have felt strength in them and I am so extremely grateful and humbled.

We never know what heavenly father has in store for us and even though this was tragic and devastating and I sometimes feel like my heart is broken in two, I agreed to this before coming to earth and I know that through our trials come blessings. I am so grateful for the outpouring of blessings since this happened. I have so much to be thankful for and that's what I will focus on.

My grandma was one of the best! And she is my grandma for eternity. I am so grateful for that!

We did everything we could...

2011-04-13T05:58:00.000-07:00

Those words pierced my heart.. This only happens in movies... She is only 71.. I can't lose her yet. I'm not ready. She is healthy. Why did this happen? No no no no NO NO!!!!

I recieved a phone call last night at 6:30. "Kelsey there has been an accident. Get in your car, pick up your sisters and come to Calgary." She's got to be ok. She is so young and healthy.. And we're still sad about losing Gramps a year ago.. Shes for sure going to be ok. She has to be ok!!

As we arrived at the hospital the stars ambulance arrived at the same time. I saw her for a split second as they quickly wheeled her by. Her face. She wasn't going to make it.

As they led us down a long windy hallway and put us in a room called the "Tranquil Room" I really knew that she wasn't going to make it. My grandma. My friend. Sophies best friend. The grandma that I wished was my mom when I was a kid. The grandma that called me every single day just to chat. The grandma that came in for a "sleepover" every other week just cause Sophie needed to see her Grandma Chicken. The grandma that when she was near I instantly became a 5 year old little girl and nestled in to her chest and cuddled. The grandma that had the funniest sense of humor that could make me laugh to tears. The grandma that taught me more life lessons than anyone. The grandma that I confided in. The grandma that listened. The grandma that loved me. The grandma that was more than just a grandma. She was one of the most special people in my life.

I am so glad that I cuddled on the couch for so long with her the night before . I'm so glad that she came on a trip to Martins Cove with Spence and I and the kids the week before. I am so glad that my kids got to know the most amazing woman in the world. I am so glad she was my grandma!!! I am one of the lucky ones that got a best friend in a Grandma!

There is a bright side that I will go to for a few seconds here and there. She missed my grandpa horribly. She missed her little Kathleen that she hasn't seen for 47 years horribly. She was lonely. We did everything we could to fill the void of her husband but she was excruciatingly lonely for my grandpa. They are together. She wanted that. That brings me comfort.

But then the overwhelming sadness, madness and heartache kicks in.

So here I am 12 hours later. Sleepless. Tired. Sad. Confused. Sick. Without my grandma. My dear sweet, full of love, giving, gracious, charitable, knowledgeable, perfectly perfect grandma.

But my grandma is happy. Reunited. Perfectly perfect. Where she belongs.

But I will miss her dearly.

Having a sick little girl..

2011-03-29T22:15:00.000-07:00

Makes you really appreciate a happy little healthy one.

Soph has had one thing after another this month. She went from a nasty cold, to an ear infection, to an eardrum rupturing and fluid leaking from her ears for 4 days, to 2 days of puking.
She was happy, healthy and her normal little self today and it made me realize how much I have missed her!
I need to get her little immune system strong again.. Does anyone have any suggestions?

Welcome to the family

2011-03-17T21:32:00.000-07:00

I love you I love you I love you minivan!!!!!

As if I drive a minivan. I felt like everyone was staring and laughing at me as I drove down the street...

But nonetheless, I am in love!!

Scarred for life

2011-03-17T11:18:00.000-07:00

This is a face we see quite often from Little Miss Ell.. usually it's because she wants to be held. Yes, she is still a baby to me and quite attached to her mama.

Yesterday I saw this face times 1000 for what seemed like an eternity. We were at the car dealership test driving a van.. yes, a van and no, i am not pregnant. Anyway it was getting a little chilly out so I told Spence I was gonna go sit in the jeep with the girls while he talks to the salesman. In goes Ella first. As Im buckling her in her seat the little sneak pulled my keys out of my hand without me even noticing. I get her all in, shut the door, and hear a lock and the car beeps.. Oh crap! She has locked herself in the car. I say to her, "Ella push the button" She keeps pushing the lock buttton then drops the keys on the floor. Shes buckled in her seat so she can't grab them and is trying to grab the door handle and can't so she starts trying to with her foot.. Poor dear starts panicking, Sophie is panicking.. Oh my Mama is panicking.
I call for Spence and luckily the guy that is selling cars is able to write down our VIN number and cut us a new key.. Good thing we were at a dodge dealership. Anyway we got poor little traumatized Ella out after about 25 minutes and the car salesman got a sale.. Yes, we bought a van. Haha! Never thought we'd actually do it but I am soooo excited!!

Oh I love a good day...

2011-03-02T20:54:00.000-08:00

You know the ones when your kids get along, share, eat what you make them, sleep good, don't sass.. I don't get a lot of those but I did yesterday!

Today on the other hand....

Random thoughts

2011-02-22T19:22:00.000-08:00

Some random things that I just can't seem to stop thinking about..

-Everytime I walk in the door to my house I feel so overwhelmed with gratitude to live here... for a lot of reasons. Let me elaborate. 4 years ago when Sophie was born Spencer and I lived with my parents, Spencer had to drop out of school because the funds were vanishing so my mom and dad graciously offered us a place to live till we got our head above water. Spencer had worked for APX the summer before but selling was not his forte so he decided to give the tech end of things a go. We loaded up our little 4 month old baby up and drove 40 hours east to Philadelphia and thats where it all began. With the debt load we had acquired from being at school in the states and me not being able to work without a visa, I would have thought that buying a house would be something that "might" happen in 10 years. Never would I have believed that 3 years later we would be buying this house. Random opportunities have come up left and right for him and we have really buckled down and budgeted. We lived in a ghetto apartment, limited our spending and really made a lot of sacrifices so that we could make this happen. Like with anything, when you really work so hard for something it makes it that much better in the end and we have loved living in this house for the last year. It's just perfect for us!

-Kinda going along with the last one, I complain a lot about spencers job. It is hard being apart from him and it can be really stressful for him also.. but I need to get a better attitude about it. Vivint (yes they changed there name) has been so good to Spencer and through this company I have met some of my best friends and Spencer has met some of his. We have brought all 3 of my siblings into it, resulting in them being very successful also... and Kara met her prince charming.. Yes I will take full credit for that one forever. So my attitude has changed... Im not saying I will never complain again but I am very grateful for all that this company has done for us and will continue to be.

How cute is he? This is 5 years ago when he first started.

- There is a time of the month.. (not the time your thinking about) every month that I have wicked bad cravings. No, Im not pregnant. Its annoying because I eat so good for 3 weeks then that week I just can't seem to control myself. I really want to lose 8 more pounds and I just can't quite seem to get rid of them.. I think I need to step it up with the exercise.

Ohhh yum!

- I was able to attend a fundraiser for a really special family in Cardston yesterday. I have been involved in productions with Brad Wynder and his awesome mama Jolene. Brad had to have extensive heart surgery last week and has been in the hospital since the beginning of December. It has been very scary for the whole family and they truly have witnessed many miracles. It was amazing to see the community join together and make it such a success. The theatre was packed all day long and people who didn't even know the Wynder family came by to show there support. It reaffirmed to me what an amazing community Cardston is and how much I want to raise my family there.

- I love Emily from the Bachelor. She is a doll. Like seriously Brad Womakkk choose her.... or your dumb

-Last but not least. My life has reached a new level of happiness this past week. I was having one of those days and then my dear sweet husband managed to make a dang crappy day to the best day of my life (ok 4th best day of my life) when he walked in the door with this beautiful thing. The camera of my dreams.. the 5D MARK 2!!! AAAhhhhh aaahhh aaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!! Like seriously aaaaaah!!!!! I still haven't come down off the adrenaline high.

So anyway there goes my most random blog post. Im sure I lost most of ya at line 425 but for those of you that lasted till the end.. good for you and.. you win a million dollars. CONGRATS!

Happy Valentines!!

2011-02-12T19:59:00.000-08:00

My baby is 2!

2011-01-27T22:22:00.000-08:00

Yep, she is definitely 2..

I love this girl! She gets me so good. She is so stinking hilarious. So much personality is packed into this little 2 year old. She loves to cuddle, loves her big sister (and loves to pick on her), has so much energy, would be outside all day even if it's minus 40, has to have her babies at all times, loves apples and gickles (pickles), thinks its funny to act like a doggy all the time, sleeps 14 hours every night, loves to dress up in pittys ( pretty princess dresses), and thinks all of our jokes are super funny (bless her heart)! We are so grateful for her... but yes she is definitely 2!

Happy Birthday baby Ella!

Christmas was great!

2011-01-13T21:58:00.000-08:00

How darling are these little nightgowns my mom made out of leftover fabric from our christmas jammies when we were this little. It was like a blast from the past.

We decided Santa had enough cookies for the night so we left him some grapes and carrots.. and some peanuts for the reindeer obviously

Christmas morning Ella just wanted to chill.. She opened her dollies and her sunglasses from the top of her stocking and she was done. Soph definitely opened the rest of her presents... Please don't judge me for still giving her a bottle. I have no excuses.. except I'm weak. :)

All in all christmas 2010 was a sucess..

My big girl

2011-01-09T17:56:00.000-08:00

IS 4! It was her GOLDEN birthday this year!!

We had a little party with the fam to celebrate the occasion. When I say family that includes the Wolseys. Kai and Gracie are sisters to my girls.. obviously. Anyway we had some yummy food, opened presents,

had some cake.. fashion fairytale cake that is

and obviously a party without dressing up is no party. Gosh I love having girls!.. seriously how cute are these little princesses?

Happy birthday my sweet little girl! You have grown up so much and your daddy and I love you so much we can't hardly stand it!

A perfect picture

2011-01-09T00:30:00.000-08:00

As a photographer I am constantly striving to get my exposure right, my composition interesting, my focus tack sharp and trying to figure out the perfect angles for my subjects. That's what some might call the perfect picture.. but to me this is the perfect picture.. Ya, you can see the toilet in our ensuite, an ugly cell phone cord on my bedside table, the focus is off.. i could go on.. BUT to me it's perfect. It's real. I happened to have my camera sitting on the dresser and quickly turned my camera onto the forbidden "auto" and snapped. My girls genuinely adore there daddy and I think this perfectly captures that.

It's official!!

2011-01-03T00:02:00.000-08:00

These two little love birds are gettin hitched! Everyone who knows me knows how much I love love my sisters!! I am just so thrilled that Kar found a guy that absolutely adores her! Jon is awesome and were so excited to have him in the family... especially Spencer. He may have a slight obsession.. Were working on it.

My new years resolution

2011-01-01T21:30:00.000-08:00

Is to be a better blogger. I have just plain sucked! It's been almost 4 months!!! Wowzas! So here I go.

It's been a great 4 months!

My girls are getting so big and fun!

It's music to my ears when I hear giggling coming from the bedroom and I peek in to see them playing with there dollys having so much fun.

My ella girl- She's such a monster sometimes. Definitely a girl who knows what she wants and most of the time gets it. She isn't talking a ton which at first stressed me out until we turned on a baby moniter in her room and have come to find out she actually does know how to talk.. just doesn't like to talk in front of people. In fact, when we acknowledge her when she says things she gets so shy and embarresed. I think she's just trying to perfect it then she'll break out the full sentances.

I just love her to death and she is such a cuddly sweet little thing. She gets me so good!

Soph is my little sweetheart. She has such a sensitive little heart and has grown up so much. She is such a big help to me! She has also made quite a few friends lately. We can't see them... Actually she admittedly can't see them either but they do keep her quite entertained throughout the day. Ella looks at her like shes loco but Sophie loves her Lily Jasmine, Katie, Jessar, and Sam. She had to wear bright red lipstick so that she could go to the fashion show with them the other day. Oh dear me! She has quite the imagination and entertains me with her big ideas on a daily basis. She told me yesterday that it was time to move because she is ready for a new house with a new, pink room for her. We settled on keeping the house and painting her walls pink instead.. Much easier.

Our little family is doing great. Spence is enjoying some down time before things start to get crazy with work again soon.. I am nice and busy with my photography and loving it. I can't believe that support and encouragement I have felt since starting this little endeavour and I am so excited for whats to come.

Lastly, I have a lot of people asking if I lost weight so here it goes... Yikes I can't believe I am posting this. Yes, I have lost 35 pounds... And the healthy way. Nothing crazy.. just the good old fashion eating right and exercise. I kinda started in June but then really commited to it in August and started the lifestyles program at the Cardston clinic. I still have 12 pounds to go but I feel so much better emotionally and physically. One thing I discovered in this process was that I actually am an emotional eater. I don't eat when I'm sad but I eat when I am happy(which is an emotion too.. haha). I guess I always just thought emotional eating was when you are depressed.. I have now learned to replace the food with other things. Since losing the weight it seems that everything has been falling into place and I have a lot more balance.

So there you have it.. THe last 4 months in review. I really am going to be a better blogger!! I promise!

Montana

2010-09-17T21:49:00.000-07:00

We went for a little holiday in Montana last week to pass the time till Spencer gets home... 1 more week! YAYAYA! Anyway we had tons of fun and the kids loved it too. We went to a fruit stand and the girls loved it! They love fruit and veggies and they just wanted to eat it all. I love Montana. It's my personal idea of what heaven is like. I can't wait till Spencer gets home and we can go as a family.

A little announcement..

2010-09-14T21:40:00.000-07:00

That absolutely does not involve me being pregnant! I am sure a lot of you know but I have decided after 2 years of going back and forth with it, to start my own photography business. I am super excited and feel like I am at a point that I am confident with my abilities to just go for it. I love photography and I have really immersed myself in learning it for the past 3 years with courses, workshops, lots of books, tutorials and a whole lot of practicing. It has gone from a fun hobby to a passion and I am so excited for the future. I will be doing outdoor pictures and newborn natural light for the next month or so then I will have a studio in my basement set up for studio shoots. Thanks everyone for your encouragement and nice comments. If you are interested I have started a page on facebook and will be doing a draw for a free session. Go on over and "like" me if your interested.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Lethbridge-AB/Photography-by-Kels/159192824091282?ref=ts

Also I have started a photography website/blog if you wanna take a peak at my work.

photographybykels.com

10 years!!

2010-08-12T11:27:00.000-07:00

I can't believe this day has come. I have been graduated for 10 years!!! I loved High School. I don't look back and think that I am so glad it's over. I had a great group of friends and have some of the best memories. I always wish I could escape from mommy life for a day and go back to High School the way it was. Life was so simple and carefree. The biggest of my concerns were what pair of jeans I would wear on the weekend. Anyway I am so glad that so many of my High School friends were there. It was like not a day had passed. I loved it all and am so appreciative for all those people that spent so many hours organizing it!!

This is Jessica's little girl, Grace. Jess and I were just a few years older than this when we became friends. She was my only friend for a lot of years because we were both so extremely shy. I think about it and laugh because she was my best friend but we never hardly even spoke to each other. We just kinda followed each other around until we decided to break out of our shells and the rest is history. She has been my friend forever and I am so glad that our little girls finally got to meet each other! There not quite as shy as we were. Fewf!

i cannot describe how much i love this chick!!!

some of the out of town girls

cousins!!

teale's little girl tessa is so cute and sophie loves her!

little finley!

i was so happy jess and lyns were there. i've missed you both!!

lori.marisa.lyns.me.jess. love all these girls!! these girls were some of my closest friends. I haven't seen much of any of them except Maris ( and really we should see more of eachother given that we live so close.. we'll be better right Maris?)

Sisters? ya... Twins? no.

2010-07-18T23:44:00.000-07:00

So it seems like everywhere we go people say how much my girls look alike. I personally think they have totally different looks but similarities too. Anyway I started thinking that maybe I had just forgotten what Sophie looked like when she was 18 months. Well I looked back at pictures and it made me realize
a. That Ella is really lacking in the hair dept in comparison to Soph at that age.
b. That I am so relieved that I finally sort of learned how to use my camera over the last 2 years
c. That my girls are wicked cute!!!!
and d. that they do look similar, but different too.

Beach Day!!

2010-07-13T22:37:00.000-07:00

This beach was the best. The kids loved it.. you could walk out into the middle of the lake and still only be up to your waist in water. Go Winnipeg for having such wicked fun stuff to do!!!

My heart...

2010-07-05T12:53:00.000-07:00

melts when they love eachother.. Sometimes it feels like it is far to rare. This was an "unposed" moment, which makes it so much better. I love that Sophie has a little sister. I love that Ella has a big sister. I love that I have 2 girls. I love. I love. I love!! LOVE!!!

We went to the winnipeg fireworks! They were pretty awesome! It was really super warm. I have a love/ hate with having warm nights. I am so grateful for air conditioning. The last picture was when we went go carting. It is seriously my new favorite thing.. I love it! I didn't get the memo that we were being hardcore.. How embarrassing for me..

tinkertown

2010-06-09T17:42:00.001-07:00

Ok this place is the most random, fun place ever. Out in a field in the middle of Manitoba is the cutest fun little amusement park with rides just for little kids. It's all super vintage and adorable and our kids were in HEAVEN! There literally was not one ride Sophie couldn't ride.. in fact Ella could ride lots of them too. We loved it!

Trip to the zoo zoo zoo

2010-06-05T00:11:00.000-07:00

Well wow! There sure are a lot of pictures on this post. I apologize!.. I tend to be a little excessive when posting pictures. Anyway I basically came out here to Winnipeg because I felt like it was my wifely duty and I really just needed to take one for the team. Don't get me wrong, I missed Spence something fierce but we just got a house that I am still trying to make my own and really... Winnipeg???? Let me say I am pleasantly surprised. I really quite like it out here. There is a lot of fun stuff to do, super fun wives and lots of little kids for mine to play with, nice nice (did i mention air conditioned) apartments, lulu lemon outlet!!!!, and the weather has been beautiful. Anyway here is pics of our trip to the zoo. We had a ton of fun and especially loved the fact that it's only 4 dollars gate admission.

They are learning

2010-05-27T13:50:00.000-07:00

It usually ends like this ....

......but I think there learning that if they smile and act cute then the picture taking will be over sooner.

I feel like someday they will thank me for the millions of pictures I take of them.

I love these cute little superstore outfits.

(and there cute little faces)

She's a smart little girl

2010-05-22T13:11:00.001-07:00

This is the conversation Sophie and I had the other day. I have to write it down so I never forget it.

Side note: 6 months ago when my grandpa passed away we went back and forth on bringing Sophie to the meet the family. We finally decided to bring the kids for a little while then Spencer's parents took them home. Sophie did really well and just assumed that he was sleeping.

So here it goes..

We are driving down the street past the funeral home and Sophie sees it. She got so excited!

Sophie: Mommy! Theres heaven right there. It's not in the sky anymore. Lets go see Grandpa Chicken.

Me: Soph, that's actually not heaven. It's where Grandpa Chicken went before he went to heaven ( I thought it would make more sense to her)

Soph: That's where he was having a nap when he didn't have anymore oweys huh?

Me: Yep. Grandpa doesn't have oweys anymore.

Soph: Do you know how Grandpa chicken got to heaven?

Me: How?

Soph: His little girl came and got him (they had a little 2 year old pass away)

Me: That's right Soph

Soph: Yep, because she has wings

(tears streaming down my face in complete silence. i have no idea where she got that from)

Soph:(big sigh) I miss Grandpa Chicken so much

Me: I miss him too Soph

Soph: Don't be sad mommy. If were good kids we'll see him again.

I think these little ones know a whole lot more than we think they do.

What a difference a year makes...

2010-05-17T17:28:00.000-07:00

Every little girl needs a best friend

Sophie and Grace have been best friends since they were little babies

Sophie would drop anything to play with Grace

Last year we had a fun little photoshoot with the girls. Sophie didn't cooperate as much as I had hoped but Mandy still got some beautiful pictures of them.

This is them 1 year ago

These are the pictures are from last night.. I can't believe how much they have changed in a year. They are such little princesses and I love them both so much.

I have TONS more I will post later. (some super cute ones of Ella and Kaia too).

One of my favorite places on earth

2010-05-11T13:49:00.000-07:00

I love Waterton! We are so lucky to live so close to this little piece of heaven.

We spent the day there on Mother's Day and it was perfect.

Tough to be away from Spence,

but perfect in every other way.

ps. Happy Mothers Day to my mom, mother in law, and grandmas

Love you all!!

takes me back

2010-05-05T13:27:00.000-07:00

..who used to have these little pink lovelies in there hair every saturday night.?

only to wake up to this..

it finally was relaxed and looked cute by the time bedtime came.

Sophie loved it more than anything and could not get enough of the mirror. Totally took me back 20 + years ago..

I mean what?? I am seriously not that old...

7 years!

2010-05-02T13:18:00.000-07:00

May 2nd, 2003

It was a good day.. the best day.

I woke up to the sun shining.

My mom and I hurried into town and took a quick trip to the church so I could take a peak at the decorations.. perfect!

I walked into the temple KNOWING that I was doing the right thing.

I was so excited and jittery.

People talk about "the look" that they get from there husband to be the first time they see them on there wedding day.

Ohhh I know about the look.

Tears filled up in his eyes and I knew that he was as sure about it as I was.

7 years! Go us!

I love my husband, I love my husband!

He knows how to handle his 3 girls perfectly.. believe me, It's not easy.

He's the best.. seriously.

Happy anniversary Spence!

Wish you weren't in Winnipeg.

confessions of a crazy mama

2010-04-28T10:23:00.000-07:00

So yesterday at about 4:30 I decided I needed to go do some errands. It's been just over a week since Spence left and getting used to doing everything on my own is gonna take some time. Anyway we finally got out of the house and I knew that the kids would be getting hungry. I was gonna be real quick and we would be home by 5:30 and we could eat supper and it would be great.

Well one errand led to the next and pretty soon I hear Ella saying, "Yum, yum." (that means she's hungry).. then I hear her eating something. I turn around and she is eating a fry.. a day old fry that was in her carseat from the night befores "dinner". I literally burst out laughing. I am the mom I said I would never be. What has become of me.. There are soooo many things wrong with this picture.

1. Fries!!! I said I would never do it.. who gives there kids fries for dinner? I was at costco and it just seemed all to convenient.

2. Feed you kid already.. then she wouldn't have to eat the fries from her carseat.. which brings me to the last one

3. Clean out your car seat lady!

I remember reading all kinds of books before I had Sophie. I was sure that I wouldn't ever break the rules. I would NEVER give my kids anything deep fried. (supersize me anyone?). I would never let my kids sleep with us... Sophie may or may not have slept in my bed every night since Spence left (not her idea either). I would nurse my kids for a year (5 months with Ella.. that's close right?)

I am sure I have seriously grossed out many by this confession.. I could try and give you all the reasons I gave my kids fries for dinner and I could tell you that I have been sick as a dog this week and it takes a lot of energy to take care of 2 kids on my own.. I could tell you that I did vaccum and wash out my jeep 2 days before, but I won't.

I also won't tell you that instead of going home and making my kids a delicious, healthy dinner I went through the mcdonalds drive through..

I know you all have your confessions.. I wanna hear em.

ella ella ella...

2010-04-23T13:13:00.001-07:00

Something happened to my baby..

my angel baby

She is not a baby! She's getting big and feisty, and hilarious, and noisy.. did i mention feisty??

She tells me no and get's mad when Soph cuddles me.

She is super mischievous. When it gets really quiet I start to get very worried.

ok. seriously my baby was an angel for the first year of her life.

where did she go?

But I really really love her...

She's affectionate and sweet and loves her big sister so much.

She cuddles me all the time.

Her little baby words melt me.

She loves to dance and sing.

She makes me feel like the funniest person ever and laughs at everything I do and say.

She gets a kick out of herself.

oh.. and she still sleeps like a dream

... I ADORE my little toddler

I just miss my baby.

My sweet, easy baby.

(my baby that would lay on the floor all day and smile)

My kids

2010-04-15T13:09:00.000-07:00

... because I think they are darn cute

I have almost completed my photography course and will be starting an advanced class in a few weeks. I have loved learning more about the beauty of natural light. I took these right next to my front window. I have loved having my little models to practice all my weekly assignments on.

ps. how awesome is sophie's messy hair.. spur of the moment photoshoot

one last hoorah

2010-04-14T14:42:00.000-07:00

We have made a lot of trips to Kalispell this year.. And I do mean ALOT. We have come at least once a month. That's one aspect of Spencer's job that I love--we get some serious family time 8 months out of the year.. not so much the other 4.

Anyway we took one last trip to Kalispell before Spence starts up his office. Boo hoo! Anyway I had too much fun shopping and Spence enjoyed having Jon this time to look at guns and do "boy stuff" with.

Ella was teething the whole time so that wasn't fun, but luckily I had a lot of people to take turns entertaining her.

ps. Kalispell is my heaven...

Happy Easter!

2010-04-06T18:36:00.000-07:00

Easter was perfect.

Woke up in the morning and had a little easter egg hunt at our house.

Ella ate waaaay more jellybeans than a little one year old should.

Soph of course was in heaven from all the cheap.. sorry, beautiful princess accessories she got.

I found this picture from last years easter

I can't believe how much they have both changed...

We watched the first session of conference at home and headed to Cardston in between for the second session. Conference was the highlight of the day for sure. I loved all of the speakers and the whole time just kept thinking, "I needed this so much".

After conference it was round two easter egg hunt. This was way better than ours. My mom had a whole treasure hunt. Soph loved every minute of it.

Jon, Kara and Soph enjoying some good old country air. haha. Jon is apparently a horse whisperer according to Kara. She got herself a good one.

It was a little windy but I still managed to snap a pic of Soph during the treasure hunt. Ohhh she's so cute!

Strawberries = Love

2010-04-03T09:57:00.000-07:00

I love strawberries! Spence does too.. but my girls LOVE LOVE LOVE strawberries. They would eat them all day long if I let them. I have to limit there intake because between the 4 of us we are going through container of them a day. Last night when Soph was about to go to bed she asked if she could please please just have a snack of strawberries....

Well with those big blue eyes looking up at me how could i even say no..

I put 4 strawberries in a bowl and gave them to her... oh my MELTDOWN.. that was not enough. Mostly the problem was she was tired and acting totally irrational so off to bed she went without her strawberry snack.

This morning as I made her and Ella toast and strawberries for breakfast this is how our conversation went.

Sophie :Mommy, are you giving me strawberries because you love me so much?

Me: Yep.

Sophie: Why didn't you love me last night?

Me: I loved you last night, I just didn't love the way you act when you get tired.

Sophie: ..after thinking a long time "Aren't mommy's supposed to love there girls even if there bad"

Me: Sophie I do love you, even when your bad. But you don't get "rewarded" when your bad.. ( i thought i would throw in a word i thought she didn't know.. maybe quiet her up)

Sophie:I was sad all night mommy....

... oh my... everyone warned me about the 3 year olds.. haha! As challenging as this age may be at times I sure do love it.

Vegas baby

2010-04-01T22:55:00.000-07:00

I love Vegas! I love Vegas!!! One of our friends, Ryan was turning 30 so his awesome wife, Beth organized a suprise party in Vegas for him.. Seriously best wife ever! Anyway we just went for the weekend and it was the best. It was a nice little getaway before the crazy madness of summer season starts for Spence. If you are wondering why there isn't a single picture of Spencer.. it's because I pretty much didn't hang out with him. The girls went shopping while the boys golfed. We had so much fun and I wish it was longer. We are already planning our next trip. I am hooked. Through Spencer's job over the past 4 years I have met some of the greatest girls and have maintained good friendships with them. We don't see each nearly enough but when we do we pick right up where we left off. It was so fun to hang out with some of them this weekend and meet some new friends also.

We stayed at the New York, New York. It's a cool hotel, reminiscent of New York obviously. They have a statue of liberty outside it and it has a rollercoaster that wraps around the whole hotel. I wouldn't suggest it for kids though. It's pretty smoky.

we totally got a limo.. i am so mad this is the best picture i got of it.. its cute of beth and vic but not of the limo. whatev!

ummmm ok. best buffet ever.. any eating healthy was thrown out the window. all of the menu items were super fancy so you can try out all of those dishes your too scared to order. if anyone goes to vegas, hit up the wynn buffet! you won't regret it.

shopping.. it was the best weather!

frozen hot chocolate from "serendipity".. it was good.. not $10 dollars good.. but we can say we did it and we got a picture so hey.

randee and i and our candy apples. ya, it was a scandelous night of eating at the buffet

Anyway we are back to real life now and I am more tired then ever..

Picture time

2010-03-25T23:45:00.000-07:00

I have been taking an online photography class and so for my assignment this week I had Soph help me out. It was a beautiful day and perfect for pictures. I write this as I hear the wind pretty much blowing my house over.. Anyway Soph took this photoshoot very seriously and pretty soon was telling me how she was going to pose and how she was going to do something "beautiful with her eyes". It was all her idea to lay in that brown brown grass but what do you know, i kinda like it. Sophie is really becoming such a "big" little girl. She has become my little buddy and sometimes I find myself talking to her like she is 25... partly because she acts like she is 25 sometimes.

I was discouraged yesterday because we went to ballet and midway through there class the director decided it might be fun for the parents in the lobby to "drop in" unexpectantly on there class to see the dance that they are working on for the recital. It totally caught Sophie off guard and she just stood there like a deer in headlights and didn't even move. I felt so bad for her because I could tell she was uncomfortable and I was very uncomfortable and it was all just a bad situation. I started to think maybe she didn't even like ballet and that I brought her to a class every week that she didn't even want to be at.. Anyway I asked her why she didn't dance she said with the sweetest little voice you ever did hear, "I was just so exhausted." Poor dear.

Anyway the point of this story is not that she didn't dance, because I know that she loves to dance and while watching dancing on TV she does all the moves perfectly but my point is that I never ever wanna be one of those moms that signs there kids up for all the things that she "should" be doing that are socially acceptable, even though they may not enjoy them at all.. I want to be a mom that embraces there childrens talents even though they may be different than what I imagined...

I got to know a mom through Anne of Green Gables that had put her daughter in ballet and after 2 years noticed that she didn't seem very excited about it so she asked her what she wanted to do and she said she really wanted to play hockey. She signed her up and she loved it and kicked all those little boys butts. Anyway I may be getting a little ahead of myself.. she is only 3 and she really does LOVE ballet and I have noticed a major improvement as far as her gracefulness.. she used to trip over her own 2 feet all day long but she never does anymore.. Point is, I hope that I can give my kids the freedom to express themselves in whatever manner they choose. I was given that privelage when I was growing up and it led to so many wonderful moments on stage that have really helped me become the person I am. I hope that Sophie finds something she really loves and has a passion for, whether it be ballet, hockey or underwater basket weaving. I just love her...

My kind of birdhouse...

2010-03-23T13:45:00.000-07:00

Why wouldn't we have a pink birdhouse right? Sophie is convinced that we are going to have a family of robins that will live in our backyard.. We'll see. I think it's a real cute birdhouse.

Spencer informed me that it's actually a "bird feeder".. I choose to believe that there really will be a family of robins that will live in it also.. so in that case it would be a birdhouse. ( a little bit of a crowded birdhouse, but a cute one)

I miss...

2010-03-18T00:03:00.000-07:00

It's been almost 4 months.. but I still miss him so much it makes my heart heart thinking about it.

Time does heal, but I still miss him so so much.

I go from being totally content with it to being a total mess or emotions.

I heard a recording of his voice and oh my gosh!!! It was bad.

I watched a music video and it threw me for a MAJOR loop... Kristi saw it and said she felt like the last part was written for me.. It brought back so many feelings and memories.

My heart stops for a minute every time I even hear the word "cancer" especially when I hear someone I know has it..

When I did Anne of Green Gables it killed me to think that he would have been there cheering me on just like every other show I ever did.. he would have been out in the lobby bragging to any and everyone that I was his grand daughter (oh you have no idea.. ).

I miss his humour. He always knew how to make a person laugh.. even if it might have been inappropriate. Ha!

I see my girls getting bigger and learning new cute things and I wish he could tell me how proud he is of them ( I know he is proud of them)

I miss seeing him hold my grandma's hand.

I understand it was his time.... but I really really miss him.

I know he is happy and healthy and with his little Kathleen and I really am so happy for him.

I know I will see him again.

Luckily I KNOW that.

what i have been up to...

2010-03-08T16:31:00.000-08:00

After 4 years I got back up on the stage and played the part of Miss Stacy in Anne of Green Gables. It was so much fun.. I have done over 40 plays in my day and have actually done this one twice. Last time around was over 1o years ago and I played the part of Diana Barry. This play (and movie) hold a very special place in my heart. I loved every minute of it and am so happy that I have such a great support system that makes it possible for me to do what I love even after having 2 kids. Between Spence, his parents and my Grandma I always had a babysitter. THANK YOU!!! How awesome are my "puff sleeves"? There is a line that says Miss Stacy's puff sleeves are so big she has to walk through the door sideways.. Not the most flattering look but I guess at one point in time they were fashionable.

best day in a little girls life

2010-02-21T13:10:00.000-08:00

Sophie and Grace's ballet teacher, Miss Alida finally danced for them. To say they enjoyed it would be a major understatement. I wish I would have gotten a picture of there faces. It was adorable.

I am over winter!

2010-02-09T14:57:00.000-08:00

1 semi nice day and I am already soooooo excited for summer!!! .... by semi- nice i mean 1 degree. You know your canadian when...

ps. i am looking forward to the nice weather aspect of it all but not the spending the majority of the summer a single parent in Lethbridge while the husband works in Winnipeg.

Little miss one year old!

2010-02-08T08:59:00.000-08:00

Ella turned 1 last week.. We haven't had a party yet (bad mom bad mom)... we will have one once were in our new house. Anyway Ella's first year of life she was the epitome of angel baby. She slept the night the night she was born and never turned back, she was soooo low maintenance hardly ever cried, just smiled. My grandpa called her sweetie pie because.. well.. that's exactly what she is. That's what everyone calls her now. In fact I rarely hear Soph call her anything but Sweetie Pie. Anyway the day she turned 1 in came a little attitude. I can't even complain. I had the most luxurious 1 year with my little accessory. I toted her anywhere and everywhere whether it was nap time or feeding time or anytime she would be her happy content little self. She really is still such a good little thing. She's just getting funny! She grabbed a pool ball the other day and hit herself in the head with it... she was so mad at that pool ball that she threw it and then kept crawling after it and yelling at it then throwing it again. It was hilarious and frightening.... It's almost like she has gone from baby to little girl. I was making dinner the other night and all I could hear was little giggles in the room and I went to Sophie's room and saw the two of them playing with barbies. It is so crazy that they are doing that already. I am so excited for this new phase of Ella's life. The second year of life is so much fun... Here is a picture of every month of sweetie pies life:

5 days old

1 month

2 months.. that's ALL she did for 4 months was sleep. All day and all night. I was so spoiled!

3 months

4 months

5 months

6 months

7 months

8 months

9 months

10 months

11 months

1 YEAR!!!!

packing.....

2010-02-04T11:48:00.000-08:00

1 week from today we will be moving into our new house! ... just in time for valentines. yep spence bought me a house for valentines! ... i just don't know how he will top this one next year.

speaking of sisters...

2010-01-23T12:17:00.000-08:00

She might as well be my sister..... she's as close as it comes. She's the best friend Il could ask for. Spence and Ben have been best buds forever and so when he married Kristi I was thrilled. She has been there for me in the best and worst of times. When my Grandpa was sick she was the best support I could ask for. She is the nicest mom to her girls.. I am pretty sure Sophie loves her more than me. and ps i ADORE her girls!!!

Our husbands get so annoyed because they say that we are pretty much the same personality. We drive them crazy because we tend to get a little out of control. I laugh so hard it hurts when were together.. even when were not together were chatting on our blackberrys... laughing so hard it hurts..... seriously it's kinda ridiculous.

Anyway I love this chick and am so grateful for all she does and what a caring, generous, supportive, HILARIOUS, wicked awesome best friend she is!

sisters...

2010-01-21T22:12:00.000-08:00

Last night I had one of the scariest nights of my life... Kara called me in a hysterical panic saying that Kimber had been in a car accident. Without getting into too much detail she knew she had been in an accident close to her house, she didn't know where and she didn't know how bad but she knew the ambulance was on the way. Luckily I live just around the block so she came and picked me up and we went looking for the ambulance. She turned out to have only minor injuries but for that 5 minutes I had a million thoughts go through my head.. what if she isn't ok? How would I ever live without Kimber? Have I told her how awesome she is enough? Anyway it's moments like that, as scary as it was, that I think we all need to reprioritize and not take the important things.. and people for granted. As Kara and I sat on Kimber's bed in the emergency room I looked at them both and really truly felt so much gratitude for them both. I know a lot of people grow up hating their siblings but it was never like that.

Growing up Kara and I were really close. We always went to each other for advice and we knew everything about each other. My mom and dad always say that all they would hear every night at bedtime was giggling from our room mostly on my end because she was always making me laugh. She is the most caring person I know. She is so crazy off the wall and has so much energy and motivation.

As we got older all of a sudden Kimber wasn't the little baby sister anymore (she is 7 years younger than me.) Anyway, Kimber and I have become so close. Our personalities and desires are so similar and we see each other almost every day. I love how she always asks for advice from me and I really believe that she really values my opinions. She is the youngest but she is the best example to me. She lives so righteously and bases all of her decisions on the spirit. Anyway I love my sisters! I LOVE MY SISTERS!!!! They are both so funny and witty and spontaneous. They have such fun, dramatic, glamorous lives that I love to live vicariously through and we have so much fun together.

As we were driving home from the hospital we started talking about how lucky we are to have each other... I can't imagine my life without either of them. They are so important to me and this really reminded me of that.

It also made me think about how extremely lucky these two little sweeties are to have each other...

I love it!

2010-01-18T17:56:00.001-08:00

I am so lucky to have 2 of the worlds cuddliest little girlies. Every time they lean there soft fuzzy little heads on my chest I melt. Mmmmm mmmm yum!

Tooo wicked the olympic torch came through LETH!!!

2010-01-17T22:47:00.000-08:00

When we heard that the olympic torch was coming through little old Lethbridge we were pretty pumped! Of course the Wolsey's came over and we were all geared up to go. The festivities didn't start for another hour so we were just hanging out at our house when all of a sudden we hear all of this loud music. We ran outside to see what was going on and low and behold the torch was coming down the street at the end of our block! It was so wicked! There wasn't even hardly anyone there so he ran right past us. Crazy!

The girls were so excited.. they didn't really know why they were so excited but they were...

It was really cool once we got to Henderson Park where all the excitement was. They were giving away cool stuff and there was local performers. Sophie and Grace were waving there flags around.. kinda sounds lame but I was pretty proud to be canadian!

they were giving out these cool coke bottles in aluminum bottles... i asked how much they cost and he said a smile. so here are our biggest smiles. ps. i love kristi wolsey!

We even got a pic with one of the torch bearers. Spencer is super cool right?

When we got back to our place the girls of course had to have a bath together and get there jammies on.. it's kinda a tradition with them... then the photoshoot begins... (also a tradition)

All in all a super fun night!! Now I must get some sleep!

Christmas and... someone's 3!!!

2010-01-14T11:58:00.000-08:00

A little recap or the last month:

Christmas came and went.. got the girls cute little dresses from Target. I always always wanted 2 little girls that I could dress the same. Poor dears. I hated it when my mom did that to us and now here I am doing the same darn thing.

Spent sometime at the Wolseys before Christmas. Kristi and I acted like we were 14. It was awesome!

Christmas was a very different christmas. I feel like when my Grandpa died we all went into shock for a little while.. It seems like that shock was wearing off by christmas and everything became really real for all of us that we really were spending christmas without him. Gosh, it was a little rough. We spent a little while on christmas eve at my grandpas grave where we sang Christmas songs and lit a candle inside a frozen cover. It was so neat and I would love to be able to do that every year.

Ok so this year for christmas we decided to focus more on what christmas was all about and not get caught up in the presents. We each bought 1 present for ourselves, wrapped it up and on christmas day we put them all in a pile. We each chose one, opened it and had to guess who's it was. I did buy my kids presents so we all sat and watched them open there presents which is the most fun anyway. It was awesome and so low stress, but mostly could focus on the true meaning of christmas.

Last but not least MY BABY IS 3!!!!! I guess I shouldn't say my baby because I have a baby but seriously-- how did this happen??? She was so excited about her party. We had it at the APX office and she had so much fun. 3 years has come and gone and my sweet little baby has become a little girl. She:

-Loves princesses.. anything princess. She sees someone in a fancy dress and she thinks she is a princess. She would wear princess dresses everyday if I let her. Her favorite princess is usually cinderella but it does change on occasion.

-She is the best BEST cuddler. She nestles up next to me and her little body just melts. She always says "i need a little cuddle time k.."

-She is super shy to people she doesn't know. I think people think she's snobby until she warms up to you.

-She tells me that when she's bigger she's going to fly instead if walk.

- She hates wearing pants. She say it makes her legs hot

-If you ask her what she wants for lunch she almost always says a salad.. she loves greek salad especially. I wish I loved salads as much as her.

-She is SUCH a good big sister. She has never pushed, pinched, bit or hit Ella. She is super gentle and affectionate with her

-She says the funniest things and picks up on everything. I think she's a pretty smart cookie.

We love her crazy lots and hate to see her get bigger and grow up but love watching her learn and grow and get so excited as she does it. Happy Birthday Sophie Pie.

October

2009-12-10T12:28:00.000-08:00

A few pics from October....

September....

2009-12-10T11:36:00.000-08:00

First of all.... thank you sooo much for all of your nice comments, phone calls, emails, ect ect. I am so grateful for the support of family and friends at this time. The funeral and everything was lovely and we are all doing ok.

Anyway here is an update on September...

Sophie started ballet with her bestest friend, Gracie. They are so adorable and hold hands and will not leave eachothers side the whole time.

I took some pics of the girls... I love this truck!

more pics of the girls out at G packs!

Leavitt Country Fair!! I LOVE!! It makes me really feel like a small town girl. I can't wait to move my family back here someday... hopefully soon

more pics of the girls.... am I obsessed?

So as it seems... September I wasn't up to much other than taking pics. Ha!!

Goodbye

2009-11-24T21:43:00.000-08:00

I thought I was ready for it, but I wasn't. It was heartbreaking. Sunday afternoon we went in for a visit and shortly after he took a turn for the worse. It was aweful to see him in so much pain. His cancer progressed and needed so much pain medicine that he slipped into a deep sleep for over 24 hours. I was fortunate enough to spend the whole time with him thanks to Spencer and my in-laws. At 11:30 last night we were all in the room and I went and layed on the couch and my mom walked into the hall and my grandma sat down right next to him so it was just the two of them. He took one deep breath, opened his eyes and looked at her and passed away. He was waiting till it was just the two of them. It was so sweet. I am so grateful that I could be there during his final hours and after. I had many amazing spiritual experiences.

I had a long time to think about things while he was in his deep sleep. I got to spend a lot of time with him alone and tell him things I really wanted to and say goodbye. I had time to reflect on the memories I am hanging onto to get me through this.

Everytime I walked in the door to there house Grandpa would get a huge smile on his face and put his finger on his cheek so I would kiss it. When i was pregnant with my babies he would grab me as I walked past his chair and talk to my tummy. After my babies were born he was there to see them within hours of having them. My grandma and grandpa would come to visit us sometimes 4 or 5 times a week when we lived in Lethbridge and they would always have a pack of timbits. He always cried when he held my babies. He was so soft hearted. When I lived with them before we got married my coat was stolen at church (go figure) and he was so upset about it. The next day he took me to Lethbridge and insisted on buying me not one coat, but 3. He was so extremely loyal and his family was EVERYTHING to him. He was so protective of us. I got the sweetest facebook message from one of my very best friends just hours before he died and she mentioned how she remembers how happy he was to hear me sing. He always bought seasons passes to the shows for the 5 summers I did summer theatre and was so dedicated to coming to those shows.

I have such fond memories of him but the best one was while he was in the hospital. He had been there for a few weeks and knew that he was slipping quickly. I came to visit him and he pulled me up on his bed and wrapped his arms around me and told me how much he loved me and how proud he was of me.

This has made me really think about family. My grandpa and grandma loved each other so much and did everything for each other, there kids, grandkids and great grandkids. We all loved him so much and craved being around him. I just hope that someday I can look back at my life and feel like I have that many people that i have made an impact on that many people and have that many people that love me. I hope that Spencer and I can have a relationship just like theres. They had so much spunk and they were always laughing at each other and having so much fun. My grandpa has loved her since he was in Grade 5. They have the most adorable love story. When he was sick quite often I would walk into his room and they were both snuggled up on that tiny little hospital bed fast asleep. It was so sweet.

As I layed down on the couch just before he died I was in between awake and sleep and I imagined his tiny 2 year old Kathleen reaching her little arms out for her daddy and him wrapping his arms around her and hugging her so tightly. I can't even imagine how hard it was for them to lose her at such a young age and how amazing it was for him to see his little girl again. I know that we can do the same someday.

Thank you everyone for your phone calls, texts, comments and messages. I have felt so much love and support from so many people.

I love you Grandpa "Chicken"! I will miss you so much!

Im still here!

2009-11-19T20:34:00.000-08:00

Wow it has been a long time. I actually have a lot of good reasons.
#1. Our computer has a virus and I cannot get on the internet. We ordered a mac about a month ago and it is just going to be delivered tommorow! WAHOO!!!! I kept thinking that I couldn't do a post without pics but what the heck.
#2. We have been living with my mom and dad and up until last week they didn't even have high speed internet and so it was painful to even go online.
#3. I am lazy!
Ok.. So really a lot has been going on. It has been hard to even think about posting let alone anything. As I said before we have been living with my mom and dad. We are going to buy a house. In fact we put an offer in on a house and the inspection fell through. We were bummed but there was a reason we are supposed to be here right now.
My grandpa Pack was diagnosed with cancer 8 years ago. It was devastating. I was living with them at the time. He was 62. I am super super close with my Grandma and Grandpa. Spence and I lived with them for 3 summers and I lived with them for a year before I met Spencer. There are only 6 grandkids in the family, 4 of which are me and my siblings so we are like there kids. I spent my childhood living just down the road from them. I rode my bike over there almost everyday in the summer. My grandpa and grandma pack are not like grandparents... they are like parents. I remember the night my mom told me that my grandpa had cancer. It was aweful. His oncologist said that it was a very aggresive cancer but that they would give radiation a shot. He went through radiation and the cancer went into remission. He was able to see me get married have 2 kids and I consider that such a blessing. My girls absloutly adore him and he absloutly adores them.
A month ago Spencer's grandpa Hinman died at the age of 96. He has been apart from his dear wife for 10 years and so we were so happy he was finally able to be with her. The funeral was so beautiful and I really came to appreciate the life he lived. His love of the gospel and family has been passed through the generations and it made me realize how lucky I am to be part of his family. Grandpa Hinman requested that I sing "Goin Home" at his funeral and I considered that a very special honor. After the funeral was over my mom informed me that my Grandpa Packs cancer had spread to his bones and that it wouldn't be long.
It has been the hardest month for me. I have spent every day at the hospital watching him go downhill. It is heartbreaking to see my grandma suffer. He is only 70 and they were just starting to enjoy there retirement together. She has not left his side. She is the most amazing woman I know. Anyway It has also been the most treasured month of my life. I have had the chance to tell him exactly how much he means to me and how much I love him. What a blessing. I know it won't be long and he will be reunited with his little girl he lost at the young age of 2 and that brings me so much comfort. I have come to understand that his time on earth is coming to an end and he has more work to do on the other side.
I am so grateful that house fell through and that we can be here for my parents and they can be here for us. Everything happens for a reason. I am so grateful for the relationship I have had with my Grandpa and for the amazing memories I have. I am so grateful that he has been so close with Spencer. He has often said that he loves him like a son. I am grateful for the special bond he has had with my girls. I know that they will not remember him in this life but I will be able to tell them all kinds of stories when they are older. But most of all I am especially grateful for the plan of salvation and the knowledge I have that families are forever.

This picture was taken a few weeks ago. When we were saying goodbye we put Ella on his bed so he could give her a cuddle and she instantly fell asleep. My grandma said it was because he was so close to heaven right now that it soothed her.

Here are a few more pictures of him and my girls that I will cherish forever. I have a million more on my computer. These are just a few I found on my moms laptop.

goodbye summer!! woop woop!

2009-09-09T15:18:00.000-07:00

... no its really not normal to be excited for summer to be over, but in my case it is. I finally will have a husband again. I say will because summer is not officially over. Spence has 1 more week and then life will slow down quite a bit. He has actually been managing the techs out in Winnipeg for the month of September so it has been kinda crappy doing it all on my own. My mom and dad have been in Utah too so it has been a little rough but I am just fine. I really cant complain. This company has the best thing for our family and the second I start to complain I have to think about where we were 3 and a half years ago before APX.

Anyway not too much exciting to share. My summer was fun. I loved living across the hall from the Wolseys. I have really missed our late night chats sitting by our front doors. It has been kinda rough on Sophie not seeing her best friend Grace too, but we will be back in lethbridge before you know it.

The girls are good. Sophie started ballet this week with Gracie and she cannot stop talking about it. She loved it so much and has wanted to wear her tutu everyday. Thank goodness we accidently on purpose forgot it in Lethbridge at Kimbers house. I will post pics of ballet soon.

Ella is still cute and fun. She is getting so big- she is 8 months and not crawling but is perfectly content just sitting.

Anyway thats my little update. I have not blogged because my parents have satellite internet and its not ultra fast so it takes a coons age to download pics.

Here are just a few pics from the many millions I have of this summer.

6 months

2009-07-27T22:04:00.000-07:00

Ella is 6 months today! What I would like to know is..How on earth did I go to bed one night with a newborn baby and wake up with a 6 month old. She is a delight and I love her more than I feel like I can even handle sometimes. Sophie adores her and is so good to her. The funnest thing is watching Sophie make her laugh. No one can get her going like Sophie. All she has to do is clap her hands and Ella is in hysterics. She is so much fun and such a little happy, adorable sweetheart!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!!

2009-07-17T20:21:00.000-07:00

I had a grrreat birthday! I sold my rebel XTi last week in hopes that I would eventually upgrade to the T1i... Well Spence came home with it 2 days before my birthday. Happy day!! My husband kinda spoils me. I think he maybe felt bad that he really didn't get to spend a lot of the day with me :)... a camera in exchange for an absent husband on my birthday was ok with me... jk.. or am i?Really it was a very nice day. We went to Red Lobster for lunch then Spence had to go to work so I just hung out with my girlies for the day. My girls were a dream all day long which was the best birthday present I could have asked for. That totally reminds me of my mom what I just said. Anytime we used to ask her what she wanted for her birthday she would always say to have us not fight all day long... we used to roll our eyes and get so annoyed. Funny how we start to say the things that used to annoy us the most and we said we would never ever say.

Anyway I have had fun learning all about this camera. It's fun because its an SLR with a video camera in it too. It takes great videos too... if anyone is looking into getting an SLR camera I HIGHLY recommend this one.

My first post on a private blog!

2009-07-10T13:49:00.000-07:00

I know its kind of annoying that I went private-- but I feel its the right desicion at least for now that we are in Calgary. I was getting some creepy comments and it would have been really easy for someone to figure out where we lived from our blog. I was starting to have nightmares about it.. for real. Might sound crazy but I felt like I needed to trust my gut on this one. Anyway thanks to whoever is following me still.. The last few weeks have been good around here. I just wanted to post these pictures taken by Ashley Bennett. All of the Pack side of the family was home for my Grandma and Grandpa Pack's 50th anniversary so we were fortunate enough to have Ashley do some pictures for us. She is an awesome photographer and a good friend too. Thanks Ash so much again. It meant so much to all of us that you did this on such short notice.

On nice days we like to go up to the splash park. It was actually nice for a few days last week so we grabbed some Mcdonalds (my kind of picnic) and headed up there. It's nice today and I am just patiently waiting for my girls to wake up so that we can go!! We are all so pale and sickly looking and could really use a little color.

Going Private

2009-07-04T13:34:00.000-07:00

ok so i am a paranoid person ..... and for a few reasons I have decided to go private on my blog. If you want to keep reading my blog, comment your email and I will add you... or you could facebook me or email me at kelseypankhurst@msn.com. i will be making my blog private in about a week

I love my girls!

2009-06-30T22:13:00.000-07:00

Have I mentioned that? I have learned a few cool things in photoshop and have had fun editing some pictures over the last few days. I took some pics of the girls outside our apartments the other day. I was suffering from shear boredom, due to our roomates across the hall (the Wolsey's) going home to see family for a few days. But they are home now so life can continue being super awesome and fun!

This little one is just learning to sit up. She can only do it for short periods of time then she kinda bends in half-- but she's getting better and better everyday. Is it normal that I feel a tiny bit sad about it..? I just don't like her getting bigger. I just want her to stay a cuddly, sweet, perfect little thing forever.

To pierce or not to pierce???

2009-06-26T15:08:00.000-07:00

So I have a dillema.. I always kinda thought I didn't want to pierce my kids ears till they were older. I wasn't againts people who got there babies ears pierced but when I got mine pierced it seemed like they were always infected and i just didn't want my little baby to have super sore ears... Anyway I have lots of friends that I have talked to about this in the last 2 years and I still have yet to talk to someone that wasn't 100% for piercing there babies ears and I haven't talked to one person that there baby got infected from the earrings.. Anyway my dillema is now Sophie has been asking and asking to get pretty earrings. I always said when my kids were old enough to ask for them I would let them. Is 2 and a half a terrible age to pierce your ears.. and should I just get Ella's done while she's little.. I need help. Maybe I should just wait till there like 5.. that's how old I was...

Home for the weekend

2009-06-16T22:36:00.000-07:00

My Grandpa and Grandma Pack celebrated there 50th wedding anniversary and we decided to throw a party for them. We had a lot of fun... and a lot of tears. I just love these 2 more than I can even explain. They have been there for me at the lowest of lows and the highest of highs. I am so close to both of them and feel so blessed to have them in my life. My grandma and I always say that we are joined at the hip. In fact when we are together are hips are always connected. She is the sweetest, most compassionate, giving person i know and she is so easy to talk to. She also has the quirkiest, funniest sense of humor and makes me laugh harder than anyone! My grandpa is such a funny guy that makes friends with everyone and is so loyal and protective of his grandkids. He has always sided with us in every situation and I fear for those that cross his grandkids. He has such a soft heart and being around him puts a huge smile on my face. I have been so fortunate to live just over the hill from them the majority of my life and have spent many many days at there house. In fact I lived with them for a year after I graduated from hairschool and Spence and I lived with them for 3 summers. I can't say enough good things about them. It was a lovely weekend and I am so happy to be living so close to home so that I could be there.

I sang my Grandma and Grandpa's song "Could I have this dance" and was good for the first verse then I, (along with everyone else) lost it for the last verse. It was too hard when I looked over and saw my grandpa in tears.

We had a nice lunch at Remington Center today before I left to come home. It was delish! If you are ever in Cardston- GO!

Also we had a bonfire at my grandpa and grandmas house last night. They live on a little piece of heaven and I am so happy when I am out there! I took advantage of the perfect weather and light and took some pics of Sophie around the farm.

Happy Halloween!

2009-06-12T23:56:00.000-07:00

soo.. tonight i am in wal-mart minding my business when a lady walks up to me and checks out ella in her carseat. this is what she says to me and i quote, "oh how cute!- she is wearing her halloween costume." i completely did not know what to say- i just kinda gave her a courtesy laugh and walked away... am i missing something? i am still laughing thinking about it. i know that her bow is a little on the larger side but what? seriously- a halloween costume? this city is full of crazies i am sure of it. so anyway here is a picture of ella in her "halloween costume". when i got home i totally fell of the wagon and ate a caramilk and a crispy crunch.... yikes! oh well- its halloween!

I love her too!!

2009-06-07T22:01:00.000-07:00

Soooo I got heck from my mom that I only post pictures of Sophie and that I needed to post some of Ella so people knew that I loved her too... I really don't mean to just post pictures of Sophie but all of the fun things we do Ella is just a little angel sleeping in the sling or carseat while Sophie tells me to take "pickers" of her. Anyway here are some pictures of Ella!! I really really do love her! She is just a perfect sweet little baby and I could eat her she is so cute! My sisters call her "fake baby" because she is just so darn pleasant and happy all the time.

Trip to the zoo

2009-06-03T21:00:00.000-07:00

We finally made it to the zoo. We went yesterday and had so much fun. It was pretty warm but the little girls loved it. Sophie especially loved the "ephalants" and the "sakes" (snakes).... I guess she isn't related to me. We walked past the snakes and instantly every hair on my arms stood on end. I can't believe I even made it that close. I can't believe it but I even stood in front of the cage and let Kristi take a picture. I figure I need to face my fears. Kristi was like a proud little mommy that I did it which made it all worth it. ;) However, I still get a lump in my throat everytime I think about it. Anyway it was a super fun day!!

Kristi is such a hot mama! And I LOVE kaia's face in this pic!

This is me next to the snake... this a HUGE deal. I can't believe I did it!

gracie and i are two of a kind.. scared of almost everything. she didn't like the water mist that was shooting out of the stairs. i thought this was such a funny picture!

Splash Park

2009-05-31T15:54:00.000-07:00

this awesome splash park is only a few blocks away from our house. we took the girls there yesterday and despite it being a little chilly the girls were in heaven running around in the water. within a few minutes both sophie and jaycie were down to just there panties so next time we will remember the swimsuits.

Why am I still awake?

2009-05-11T00:32:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am awake at 2:00. I should be sleeping and I will be kicking myself in the morning but I just had to have a luxuriously long Sunday afternoon nap today. I figured I might as well do a blog post now since I'm up.

I am pleased to announce that little Sophie muffin is all trained. She loves the potty and hasn't had a single accident for over a week. It only actually took 3 days to train her thanks to freezies (thanks Krystie!) She is not dry through the night but i am in no rush for that to happen. The best thing is that she will sit on the big toilet without her dora seat on it. I can actually go out and not put a diaper on her because she will go in the stores on the toilets there. We went to the science center on Saturday and she was so good- peed on the toilets there and didn't have any accidents all day.

This picture was on the 2nd day of potty training and I kept making her sit on the potty every 30 minutes and stay on there for a few minutes. I went in to check her and she was asleep. It's a tiring job.

Anyway Randee and I packed the kids up and went to the science center on Saturday. We live right on the LRT tracks so we figured it would be easier to just take the train... I'm not quite sure it was worth the few dollars we saved on parking. Anyway we hopped on the train in Shawnessy and headed down town. It took me back 8 years when jessica and I had to take the train to hair school every morning. I actually felt kinda sick to my stomach the whole time remembering those bitter cold mornings in our all black clothes (dumb dress code), getting up super early to get on that dang train. eeeew. I'm just remembering all those crazy people on the train that Jess and I tried not to react or acknowledge when they would talk to us... ok a flood of memories are coming back.. One time we were chased in the early early morning by some creeps that jumped out of there rapist van. There was NO ONE else around and they were saying "Were doing this for a reason!" I am freaked just thinking about it... Jess if you are reading I am sure you are too...Anyway I am trailing off. Soooo we each hauled our 2 kids on the train right down to where we went to school and walked to the science center. It was super fun once we got there. There is a fun exhibit for toddlers and Sophie and Jaycee had a real fun time.
I laughed when I saw this picture of Sophie. I am grateful for her cute little button nose when I see this.

...... speaking of crazy people on the train this guy got on the train on our way home and walked straight over to me and started touching Ella. I was getting so annoyed, sicked out and freaked out. A few minutes later he put his hand on my arm, looked me in the eyes and said, "You should get a job." I don't know what that meant, nor did I want to even get into it but I was sure glad to get off that train... I bathed Ella the second we got home. All in all it was a great day and we had fun... although I dont know if we'll be too eager to take the train anytime soon.

the last few weeks

2009-05-04T09:29:00.000-07:00

A few things:

1. May 2nd we celebrated our 6 year anniversary! I am not gonna get all sappy and stuff but I will say it has been an awesome 6 years and I love this guy more than ever! He is the most wonderful husband and daddy and yay he's all mine!

2.Mandy Baker did an awesome photoshoot with Sophie and Grace. We threw the babies into a few pics too but the main focus was these little girlies. They were troopers and mandy was awesome! Check out her blog at kmbaker10.blogspot.com.

3. We arrived in Calgary safe and sound! Our apartments are great and the area has everything. We have the LRT, library, walmart and a YMCA within a few blocks of our apartments. The best part is the Wolsey's are right across the hall which we all love. Since we have been here we have been potty training for the last week. Sophie actually took to it really good this time. I say "this time" because this is about round 35.... It's about time is all i can say. We will probably still stay home the rest of the week for the most part but she is doing awesome!!! We even went to Wal-Mart this morning for a few things and no accident! GOOD JOB SOPH!!!! She is giving me the best mothers day present I could ask for.

4. Ella is still as amazing as ever. She is just over 3 months and is the most perfectly contented baby and hardly ever fusses. I don't know what I did to deserve her... She has a good routine down and goes to bed at about 7:00 and only wakes up once a night averaging about 9-10 hours straight a night. I can't even believe how rested I feel in comparison to when Sophie was her age. Kristi let us borrow this little playmat and I am so grateful. I didn't have one of these with Sophie. It is so nice. Ella spends ALOT of time under there. I'm not gonna tell you how long i had her under the other day because I am pretty sure I will sound like the worlds most neglectful mother.

Anyway we are doing good and happy to be here. Spence is soooo busy and I never really see him but I am so proud of how hard he is working. He, for the most part loves being a manager this summer and is glad for the change. There is a lot more to deal with but it's worth it. Uh oh gotta go... a certain little someone has to "pee on la polly".

YAY-PRIL!

2009-04-14T10:12:00.000-07:00

I was finally feeling like spring was really here until today... it has been smowing and cold today and we had a nasty day of wind yesterday ( i was seriously panicking as I was trying to push a cart with both my girls in it into walmart and it was blowing away) but all in all it was pretty nice week. We had a nice easter sunday. We woke up and Sophie looked for eggs all over the house and then went to church. I'm sure the speakers were wonderful but I wouldn't know because the majority of the meeting was spent in the mothers lounge. Anyway here are a few pictures of Easter.

i love Sophie's easter dress. I got it at Costco in the states for $15

One more thing.. Ella's getting big! Why does time have to fly by so fast?

We had the Wolsey's over for a BBQ and to watch the final NCAA basketball game. We have all been huge fans of UNC for a long time and they finally won!!!! YAY!!! It was a little hard to concentrate on the game with these little girlies dancing all over the place. As you can see Ben is DJ'ing in the background!

I just love how much these 2 love eachother!

Last week Manda and I took the kids to the park. Sophie skinned her knees 6 times. She is a slightly clutsy girl- that mixed with a new pair of shoes resulted in some seriously owey knees.

We enjoyed a delicious bbq of kabobs at Tanner and Amandas. My mouth is still watering thinking about it.

Work It

2009-04-13T23:16:00.001-07:00

Sophie is in love with the camera lately. I think we may be watching a little too much America's Next Top Model. I watched a whole marathon a few Saturday's ago and got absoloutly nothing done. I actually didn't even feel guilty. Anyway I have to take pictures of her doing everything. I love it of course considering it was like pulling teeth to get her to pose before. I am really hoping it stays this way .. I am doubtful though. This was right before bed after I took out her braids-- I think she was trying to distract me from putting her down actually. It definately worked- I got a kick out of her explaining every emotion she was trying to capture with every pose.

This one is "Mommy I am a kissing fish bop bop!" (She thinks that's the sound a fish makes??)

"I'm a froggy arribit aribbit"

"Mommy sooooo cute!"

I don't remember this one???

"Im so happy". (I personally think it's "Im clinically insane" but whatev

"Im saying my prayers now good job Sophie"

And this one..... Oh my I have to explain this face. Spencer likes to call it "Stink Eye", I prefer to call it "Quasimoto". I think every other picture is this face. She did it once and we laughed so hard at her and now it has become her favorite thing to do when we pull out the camera.
Anyway if you have troubles getting your kids to pose.. just watch a season of america's top model with them.... I am a terrible mom! :)

I LOVE...

2009-04-01T22:57:00.000-07:00

Now that Ella is smiling, giggling and responding to others more I am really starting to see a little bond forming between the two of these little girlies. I know it kinda sounds funny that a little 9 week old baby and a 2 year old girl can share a bond, but the way that Ella looks at Sophie with her big gummy smile could melt my heart. If Ella makes a peep Sophie jumps up and runs to her rescue with a soother in hand. She always tries to make her smile and is so proud of herself when she does. It really doesn't take much to get Ella to smile but we won't tell Sophie that. Anyway yesterday morning Sophie wanted to "watch toons with Ella". They layed there for a good 20 minutes cuddling. I looked over and they were holding hands and Sophie said, "Mommy look she is holding my hand so adorable!" Adorable is Sophie's latest favoritest word. She says it about everything. We had red wraps (sundried tomato) and she said "Oh those are adorable mommy!"

ALSO... I love "The biggest loser" and love Bob even more! I just think he is so great and I love how supportive he is to the contestants. Does anyone watch?? I really want Ron to win personally. Anyway I bought this DVD a few weeks ago and love it. It is a 6-8 week bootcamp that starts off with 30 minute workouts and moves up to 1 hour after 2 weeks. It's a really good workout and I love it. I have been going to weight watchers meetings for the last 6 weeks to lose the baby weight and have lost 13 pounds- yay! i figure 2ish pounds a week is a healthy amount. Weight watchers is the easiest thing for me to stick to. I know that I am paying to go to the meetings and I will be really ticked if I get on that scale and haven't lost anything that week. I have lost all the baby Ella weight but I didn't lose all of the baby sophie weight before I got pregnant with Ella. Pathetic, I know. Now hopefully if I add exercising I can tone up and lose some more.

And one more really weird thing. I have always been kind of a wuss when it came to spicy. I liked a good hot wing now and then but I hardly ever used hot sauce on anything. Since having Ella I have been putting hot sauce on absolutely everything. It is so weird. I drench my wraps, salads, sandwiches, eggs.. everything in it. I even found myself dipping my carrots in it today. Is that normal?..... My hormones must be really outta wack.. luckily Ella doesn't get an upset tummy from it.

Catching Up

2009-03-25T14:08:00.000-07:00

Life has been pretty great lately! Ella is 8 weeks and getting nice and chubby- just the way I like em. She has been smiling tons and is trying to giggle. She has almost gotten a few out. She has started cooing a lot and making really cute noises. She is such a good sleeper. She has basically been sleeping the night since she was born. She was sleeping 5 hours in the hospital and has since moved up to between 6 and 8 hours straight. It is awesome! Sophie has still been an amazing big sister. She is so gentle and sweet with her. She absoloutly adores her little sister. All that worrying for nothing. Anyway we have been working really hard to get Sophie potty trained by this summer. I really really really hate changing 2 sets of diapers. We have our good days and we have our really really bad days. I am trying to be patient and not push it too much.

Anyway other than that not much else is new. We move to Calgary in a month and I am getting sooo excited. We have some nice apartments to move into and it's in a great area. It will also be so great for Sophie to have her "very bestest friend" Grace there. They are just the cutest things when they get together. They are little girly girls and are so sweet to eachother. We went over to the Wolsey's house on Sunday for pizza and it was so much fun. It's always a party when we get together. I kinda forget I have a 2 year old when were there because Sophie and Grace pretty much spend the whole time in Grace's room giggling and playing with barbies and ponys.

Ella's Blessing

2009-03-17T19:55:00.000-07:00

We blessed Ella on Sunday night. Spencer gave a beautiful blessing and of course got me emotional. My mom and my aunt Marina made an adorable dress with smocking on it. I loved it. We were grateful to have friends and family there to share this day with us .... and not to mention a delicious dinner that my grandma and mom prepared. The whole night was perfect and of course Ella was an angel, as always. She was passed around all night and wasn't fussy at all. We just love her and feel so blessed to have her in our lives.

I have a ton of pics but I'm too tired to upload them all.. so check out facebook. I have quite a few on there!

A couple funny things

2009-03-11T13:11:00.000-07:00

So I just had to write this down so I never ever forget it..

We were in Wal-Mart a few nights ago and we for some reason let Sophie walk next to the cart instead of strapping her in it. I kinda took the Ella responsibility which is definately the easy one. Poor Spence got the resposibility of chasing Sophie up and down every aisle... Sophie thought it was a funny game. Anyway Sophie was running down the aisle and it was really dusty and she slipt -the next thing I know Spence is on his way down and landed right into the splits. I don't know how he did the splits but pretty soon he has gone from splits to his bum and he couldn't get himself back up because Sophie had fallen too and they were kinda intertwined. Anyway the best part was the other customers faces and especially Spencers. I have never seen him blush until then. Soph thought it was pretty funny too and she just got back up and kept running. I honestly haven't laughed like that in a long time.. #1 because Spence never does anything like that and #2 because it's usually me.

Also the other day I was wiping Ellas nose and then I folded the wipe in half and wiped Sophie's mouth. Nothing from Ellas nose even touched Sophies nose but she looked at me like she was going to puke and said, "OH SICK mom. I got a booger mouth."

A tribute to Philly

2009-03-06T09:35:00.000-08:00

So we spent the summer of 2007 in Philly with Tanner, Amanda and Watson and became quite addicted to a good old philly cheesesteak. When we get together with the Leavitts we always bring up how much we miss them--In fact we already have planned for next year to make a trip back to Philadelphia and New York and I would say that 50% of the reason is for the philly cheesesteaks. If you have ever had one you most likely understand. Anyway we have been talking about trying to duplicate them so finally we put our plan into action, buying the best cut of beef and fresh buns and did our best to make ourselves some mouth-watering cheesesteaks. We had to introduce the Bretzkes in hopes of hooking them on the delightful goodness. Kara, Cole and some of their friends also came and we had quite a fun time. We did it at the APX office or as Chels and Amanda call it "The Clubhouse", which i think perfectly describes it. There's a Pool table, fuseball, pingpong, airhockey, tanning bed, unlimited chocolate bars, chips and pop and lots of open space for the kids to run around -- needless to say we spend a healthy amount of time at the Clubhouse. Anyway they have a ginormous t.v so we thought we should plan our Philly night last night when there was a new episode of the Office which is also a favorite of all of ours. It was tons of fun and I am pleased to say that the boys did dang good on those cheesesteaks. I even indulged in 2- one wiz wit and one with provolone.. which completely does not agree with my "ditch the extra poundage" plan. Oh well. I was good for 14 days straight soooo 1 day is ok i think. I'll tell myself that anyway! All in all it was a great night and we got some cute pics of the kids. Sophie and Watson were so happy to see eachother and had a great time playing all night.

This is McKye Bretzke and the ladies, Finley Leavitt and Ella. How funny is this! He even has his arms around them. He's got a big desicion to make. Someday they won't be okay with him two timing. He's got a few years to enjoy both the ladies though.

Cousins! about 7 weeks apart

Kara and her friends

The Bretzkes I love the look on Tanner and Coles faces.. like spence is doing something scandelous....

Watson wearing sophies bow.. we have been doing this for a few years to poor Waty

Oh too cute!.. when I saw this picture it reminded me so much of the next picture of them almost 2 years ago

see what I mean.. how cute were they?

Sophie loves Tanner.. she always calls him "Funny Tanner" We will allow this for another 8 or 9 years then we might need to have a little talk about it Also.. how much do you love this wrap Amanda and Teale made me. It's like the moby wrap except they put that cute fabric on the front. I love it! I think they should sell them. I have been putting Ella in there since she was a few days old and it's so comfy. Thanks sooo much girls!

too good to be true??

2009-03-04T10:28:00.000-08:00

3 nights in a row 7:30 has rolled around and Sophie says, "I want to go to have a tubby and go to bed." WhAT!!?? okay! She really hasn't been hard to put to bed but in the last year 9:00 was an early bedtime for her. Although she would sleep in till 10 or 11 everyday... It was very nice. Anyway this has been great! I have put her to bed at 8:00 for the last 3 nights and thoroughly enjoyed my evening and she slept till 8:00 each day too. So yay for a new bedtime and double yay for my toddler telling me it's bedtime! I think she's pretty great! The other day she told me that, "Mommy baby Ella is my best friend!" It was so cute and got me all choked up thinking about the two of them growing up. I can only hope that despite them probably going through there teenage years fighting and thinking they hate eachother, someday they will love eachother the way I love my sisters!

The other day when Ella was having a nap I asked Soph what she wanted to do and she said that she wanted to take "Pickers".. So out came the camera and we took some pickers. It was fun and a nice little time Sophie and I could share together.

So I have been sick with a cold for the last week and my mom called on Saturday and asked how I was doing. I was trying to be tough and act like I was just fine. Truth is I sounded a lot sicker then I was but my mom felt sorry for me and showed up in Lethbridge on my doorstep at 6:00 that evening ready to take Sophie for the night. It was so sweet of her and Sophie was over the moon! We ran upstairs and packed her bags and out the door she went with absoloutly no remorse. She had a blast and the next day after church we went and picked her up. She has since been saying on a daily basis how she needs to "packa bag so i can go to gamma lubbits for seepover." Unfortunately Sophie got my mom sick so I don't think there will be any seepovers for the next week or so. Anyway I think this picture makes her look so old. IT reminds me of when we were little and we would pack our little suitcases and go for sleepovers at grandmas. It was the funnest time ever. We got to drink pop and eat jube jubes which never ever happened at our house. Anyway thanks Gamma Lubbit! It was delightful only having one baby for the night. One of the million perks of living close to home.

And last but not least I love this pic of Ella. She looks like a little deer in headlights! haha.

Newborn Pics

2009-02-28T18:37:00.000-08:00

We went and got newborn pics of Ella when she was 1 week old. I am so glad that we did it. I was still pretty sore and my tummy was still real pregnant looking but it was worth it.Jill Alston did them for us. Jill and I lived together in Edmonton-- we had way lots of fun and I just love her. She was so super patient with us and had all kinds of cute things to put her in and cool ways for me to hold her. I am so excited about them and think that she looks so darn cute. We were gonna try and take some of Sophie too but Soph was having too much fun playing dressups with Jills little girl, Dani. Soooo we will have to try that some other time.

House of Sickies

2009-02-24T21:23:00.000-08:00

We all have nasty colds.. Even poor little Ella. Sophie has it the worst. She cries when she coughs cause it hurts so bad. She has been such a trooper though.. she is concerned more about little Ella then she is herself. Anytime Ella coughs she gets so sad. We went to the dr today and he said it's going around and that it definately isn't RSV so thats good. actually Ella isn't really that bad-- just a little dry cough. Anyway other than that things have been great! We are loving our little Ella girl to death and Sophie is such a great help. She has grown up so much since Ella was born and I feel so lucky that she has embraced the "big sister" role so well and really hasn't been difficult at all. She still reminds me on a daily basis that "No holding Sophie cause you have a sore tummy.. just hold hands k." My tummy is virtually pain-free but Sophie is still quite concerned about it.

Today Ella is 4 weeks and is still so easy. She is incredibly content and has started to smile back at us. I love this newborn stage and wish they would stay this little for longer.

One other thing! We are officially going to calgary with APX this summer. I have known for quite sometime now but it's now official! Spence is the lead tech for the Calgary office and I am soooo excited! It is fun going to far away places but I am ready to be close to home now. We are so excited that Ben and Kristi are coming with us so the girls have little friends to play with and I have Kristi to shop with. haha. Also my sisters and brother are working for APX too so i will get to have them around YAY!

Anyway I am sooo going to bed but I thought I would post an update.. its been awhile! Here are a few pics from the last few weeks.

Daddy and his sickies. Sophie wanted to be held but wanted Spence to hold Ella too.

Sophie has been OBSESSED with makey- up! She wants lipsty sticky on all the time.

Chase came to visit from Utah just to see Ella. I loved seeing him and I am so excited that he will be in Calgary this summer with us.

LIFE IS GOOD

2009-02-05T22:30:00.000-08:00

"Mommy, Sophie wanta holdja my baby Ella." We are hearing this a lot-- which explains the many pictures of sophie and ella in the corner of the couch. As soon as she gets the baby on her lap she says, "Ok mommy take a cute picker (picture)." She loves her little sister so much. She keeps walking up to her and saying," Hi Ella! Im Sophie" just in case she forgot. She also keeps reminding me that I have such a sore tummy and to be careful. I love her! She is making this a lot easier then I imagined.

And as for this little angel... how could I be so lucky? I am loving each and every moment with her- she is such a dream baby. She is so good and content. She has been giving us 5 hours of straight sleep in the night. Yay!

I love my girls! Anyway life is great and we are loving our sweet little Ella and Sophie has been great! It's crazy how instantly you fall in love! Also my friend Jill Alston took some pics of Ella and posted a few on her blog..jillalston.blogsome.com. I will post more when I get them. I love them!